Matt's Story

I do suffer depressive moods and I was reading your page. But my reason is simple and yet pathetic. I am lonely. That is all. I am not dangerous nor would I take my life. Not now anyways. I had to save my brother from doing that. Now he would never think about it and it caused me to realize I would only hurt more people than what I was hurting inside myself. I don't know if that makes since. I don't know if I'm making since. It's about 2 am at the moment. I'm in Atlanta. My name is Matt but my friends call me walrus.... well most do anyway. The only times I am depressed is when I feel I don't have the ability to love. I suffer from being too honest and passionate in the land of one night stands and drunk orgies. I'm all about sex but I want it to have meaning you know. Yes that's totally a virgin sentence and I still am because of two reasons. I have a confidence issue because I'm fat, or I think so anyway... some people tell me otherwise while others agree. and two is because of those who agree I feel ugly and therefore look ugly to those around me. I do have great friends. I'm not antisocial I'm just shy and a bit of an odd ball. I only write to you because of what you said in your journal entry. If I was reading your entry and suffered from depression even just some of the time to email you. That is a very kind thing to say and although I am wasting your time because I'm not seriously ill or anything I thank you for writing that and expressing your kindness.

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